The One With Joey’s Porsche

2009年10月10日

The One With Joey’s Porsche


Written by: Perry Rein & Gigi McCreery
Transcribed by: Eric Aasen

605 乔伊的保时捷

瑞秋和罗斯找法官撤消婚约,但他们衣冠不整.

法官判定两人不够资格取消婚约,于是他们只好又去找罗斯的律师办离婚。

罗斯对瑞秋的爱昭然若揭。瑞秋承认这次结婚是她酒后犯错。

乔伊捡到一把保时捷的钥匙,于是守株待兔,在车旁等失主的出现。

他搞错了失主,后又因被人误会是车主而备受瞩目。当车主开着保时捷绝尘而去,乔伊仍旧意尤未尽。

菲比、莫妮卡和钱德照看弗兰克和爱丽丝的孩子们。

玩具卡在钱德的喉咙上,莫妮卡送他去急救。菲比只得独立照看小孩。

6.05 The One With Joey’s Porsche

Rachel and Ross go to a judge to get their annulment, but they air too much dirty laundry[ususally used to describe someones secrets that they dont want anyone to find out about. Everyone usually wants to know about others dirty laundry.(有点像skeleton in the cupboard)].

The judge decides they don’t qualify for an annulment, so they go to Ross’s lawyer for a divorce.

Ross makes it pretty obvious that he still loves Rachel.

Rachel reveals that it was her drunken idea to get married.

Joey finds the keys to someone’s Porsche.

He decides to wait by the car until the owner shows up.

He gets mistaken for the owner, and likes the attention he gets so much that even after the owner takes the car away, he keeps up the charade(n.猜字谜游戏).

Phoebe, Monica and Chandler take care of Frank and Alice’s babies.

Chandler gets a toy stuck in his throat and Monica takes him to the doctor.

Phoebe has to take care of the babies by herself.


[Scene: Monica and Rachel’s, the gang is there except for Rachel and Ross, who both come storming in. Rachel is still going off about Ross’s secret marriage.]

go off<俚>to angrily complain about

Rachel: I cannot believe that you didn’t tell me that we are still married!!

Ross: Look I was going to tell you!

Rachel: When?! After the birth of our first secret child?! (To All) Ross didn’t get the annulment; we are still married.

Chandler: What?

Monica: You’re kidding!

Phoebe: (overdoing it) Oh my God!!

overdo it v.做得过火 夸张

Monica: Ross!

Ross: Okay, maybe it wasn’t my best decision. But I just couldn’t face another failed marriage.

Chandler: Okay, let me just jump in and ask, at what point did you think this was a successful marriage?

Ross: Rach, come on, if you think about it, it’s actually kinda funny. (He laughs, and he laughs alone.) Okay, maybe it’s best not to think about it.

Phoebe: Okay, this is inexcusable. I am shocked to my very core我震惊不已!

inexcusalbe adj.不可宽恕的 难以原谅的/to the core adv.彻底

Ross: Phoebe, I told her you already knew.

Phoebe: Another lie. You have a sickness!

Chandler: Ross, just for my own piece of mind, you’re not married to anymore of us are ya?

Ross: Look, Rach, I was going to tell you.I just wanted to do it in my own way.

Rachel: Yes, silently, with no words.

JoeyHey……Hey, Look, in Ross’ defense, okay….(cannot come up with one word)

in one’s defense adv.为某人辩护

Opening Credits

[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Monica are at the counter getting some more coffee.]

Joey: Oh! Hey, somebody left their keys. (Looks at them) Ooohh, to a Porsche! {Transcriber’s note: Oh come on! Who would leave the keys to their Porsche behind? If I had a Porsche, I’d have the keys surgically attached to my hand!} Hey Gunther, these yours?

surgically adv.如外科手术般地/ Dr. Ing. h.c. F. Porsche AG, often shortened to Porsche AG, or just Porsche, is a German sports car manufacturer, founded in 1931 by then Austrian(adj.奥地利的) Ferdinand Porsche, the engineer who also created the first Volkswagen(n.大众汽车). The company is located in Zuffenhausen, a city district of Stuttgart(n.斯图加特), Baden-Württemberg.

Gunther: Yeah, that’s what I drive. I make four bucks an hour, I saved up for 350 years!

Joey: Na-uh! (To everyone there) Hey did anybody lose their keys?

Monica: Joey, why don’t you put them in the lost and found?

A lost and found (American English) or lost property(n.招领失物) (British English), usually found at large public places, is where visitors can go to retrieve(v.重新找回) lost articles that may have been found by other visitors. Frequently found at museums, amusement parks(n.游乐园), schools, etc., a lost and found will typically be a box or room in a location near the main entrance. It would be clearly marked so that anyone who has found a misplaced article, or misplaced an article themselves, can find it.Better organized lost and found offices will try to contact the owners of any lost items if there are any clues available (for example in the contents of a suitcase). Practically all either sell, give or throw away items after a certain period has passed to clear their storage.失物招领

Joey: There’s a lost and found? (Gunther sets the box upon the table.) My shoe! (Grabs it out of the box.)

Chandler: You left a shoe here?!

Joey: Well, I didn’t realize until I got home. I wasn’t gonna walk all the way back down here with one shoe! Y’know what? I’m gonna go find that guy’s car and leave a note on the windshield. (Goes to do so.)

windshield n.挡风玻璃

Chandler: Oh good, when he comes back for his keys, I’ll be sure to give him your shoe.

Joey: Great! Thanks. (Exits.)

Phoebe: (coming in from the bathroom) Oh, good, good, you guys are here! Listen, how would you like to spend tomorrow taking care of three incredibly cute little puppies?!

Monica: Oh my God, what a fun day! That sounds great!

Chandler: (not enthused) Yeah, O.K.

enthuse v.使热心

Phoebe: Okay, well I’ll bring them by tomorrow morning. Okay, and uh, by the way, they’re not actually puppies, they’re Frank and Alice’s triplets. Okay, see ya! (Exits.)

Chandler: Whoa-whoa-whoa! What?

Phoebe: (stops) Please! Please! Please! Please! Oh please! Please! Please! Frank and Alice asked me to babysit the triplets and I’m nervous‘cause I’ve never done that before by myself!

Monica: Don’t worry about it Phoebe, we’ll absolutely do it.

Chandler: Yeah, I’m gonna pass.‘Cause I was kinda iffy when it was puppies.

pass v.过去/iffy adj.不确定的 可疑的

Monica: Come on Chandler, come on! It’ll give us great practice for when—(realizes what she’s about to say and changes)—people with babies come to visit.

Joey(Runs by) The wrong car!

[Scene: Monica and Rachel’s, Phoebe and Rachel are having tea.]

Rachel: So, I still have boxes here. I still have boxes at Ross’s, and I have nowhere to live! Wow. I could so easily freak out right now.

Phoebe: What about me? I just found out that Denise is leaving town for a while, I don’t have a roommate.

Rachel: Well, maybe-maybe I could be your roommate Pheebs.

Phoebe: Maybe you could be my roommate!

Rachel: Well there’s an idea!!

Phoebe: Yeah!

Rachel: That would be great! Wait, how long is Denise gone for?

Phoebe: Umm, she said she’d be back December 26th.

Rachel: December 26th, huh maybe she’s Santa Claus.

(Phoebe laughs, then stops to think about it. Ross enters.)

Rachel: (deadpan) Oh look who it is, my husband. The apple of my eye.

the apple of one’s eye: (n.瞳孔 珍爱物 宝贝) 英语中,瞳孔常用“pupil”来表达,不过,“the apple of the eye”也可表达此意,如《圣经》中:“Keep me as the apple of the eye.”(求你保护我,如同保护眼中的瞳孔。)正因为这一典故,大约9世纪,短语“the apple of one’s eye”(掌上明珠)开始被人们广泛使用。从另一方面来看,用“apple”(苹果)来指代“瞳孔”,则反映了人类过去在解剖学上的无知——瞳孔(虹膜中间的小圆孔)被误认为是“实心的球体”。也许苹果是我们日常生活中最经常见到的球体,所以,这个微小的“实心球体”就被称为“眼中的苹果”

Ross: Okay, I got us a court date for tomorrow at 2:00 and I picked up all the forms. I’ll take care of everything.

Rachel: Well sure, if you say you’re gonna take care of everything I have no reason to doubt you. Give me those forms! (Grabs them from him.) All right, now I’m gonna do this my way and I don’t want to hear a peep out of you!

peep n.嘀咕声 轻轻的抱怨声[eg:I don’t want to hear another peep out of you children until you’ve finished your homework]

Ross: Okay Rach, but…

Rachel: Op! You’re peeping!

peep vt.嘀咕 叽叽歪歪

(Ross grunts something and hands her the pen he was trying to hand her.)

Rachel: Ross! Y’know what, I just got—why? Why did you do this?!

Ross: Look I told you…

Rachel: I don’t wanna hear “Three failed marriages!”

Ross: Look, if you’d had two failed marriages, you’d understand!

Rachel: Well, y’know what? Thanks to you I’m half way there! Ugh! Oh! I am so mad! Ross, I don’t think I have ever been this angry!

Ross: What about the time I said we were on a break?

Rachel: Ugh! (Stares at him.)

[Scene: The street down the block from Central Perk, Joey has found the Porsche and is writing the note.]

Guy #1: Nice car!

Joey: Yeah, it’s not mine.

Woman: (walking up) I love your car.

Joey: Yeah, it’s (looks up and sees the woman) mine.

Woman: I bet it’s fast.

Joey: Me too! Yeah. And comfortable. Do uh, do you like leather seats?

Woman: Yeah!

Joey: (checks in the window to make sure it has them) It’s got‘em!

[Scene: Monica and Rachel’s, the next day, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are baby-sitting the triplets. They each have one baby.]

Monica: Pheebs, how’s it going?

Phoebe: (rapidly) I’m doing okay. I think it’s going well. Do you think they’re having fun? Am I talking to fast?

Monica: Nope, sound like me. Pheebs, it’s going great. Look at Chandler with little baby girl Chandler.

Chandler: Little baby girl Chandler, where I have heard that before? Oh right, Coach Ruben. (Tries to get her to drink a little more from the bottle when he suddenly smells something. It’s times like these I’m glad Smell-O-Vision hasn’t been invented.) Do you know what Pheebs? When you’re done over there, we kinda have a situation over here too. (Phoebe is changing hers.)

Smell-O-Vision was a system that released odors(n.气味) during the projection of a film so that the viewer could “smell” what was happening in the movie. The technique was created by Hans Laube and made its only appearance in the 1960 film Scent of Mystery, produced by Mike Todd, Jr., son of film producer Mike Todd. The process injected 30 different smells into a movie theater’s seats when triggered by the film’s soundtrack.

Phoebe: Na-uh, no, we are all responsible for our own babies.

Chandler: See that’s where I think that you’re wrong. We’ve been playing these babies man to man; we should really be playing a zone defense.

man to man 人盯人防守/zone defense 区域联防

Monica: What do you mean?

Chandler: I just think that things would go a lot smoother if we each have our own zone. Phoebe, you can be in charge of wiping. And y’know Mon, you can be in charge of diapering and I can be in charge of looking how cute they are when they put their hands around… (He degrades into baby talk, but he means when they grab his finger.)

diaper v.<口>换尿布

Phoebe: That sounds really great, but maybe you should be in charge of wiping.

Chandler: Okay, I’m a rookie. I should not be in the end zone.

end zone<橄>(球门线到底线的) 达阵区 端区

[Time lapse, they have set up a little assembly line for diaper changes. Phoebe wipes, Chandler adds the powder, begrudgingly, and Monica puts the diaper on.]

assembly line n.(工厂产品的)装配线 流水线/begrudgingly adv.吝啬的 小气的

Monica: This is so great! This is exactly how we set the plates at the restaurant.

Phoebe: Yeah? (Checking the final diaper) Well this is not what I ordered.

Joey: (entering) Hey guys!

Chandler: Hey!

Phoebe: Hey!

Joey: Hey babies! Oh, I’m having the best morning. That uh, that Porsche I’ve got the keys to, still there!

Chandler: Shocking! Since you still have the keys.

shocking adj.极坏的 糟糕的 不像话的

Joey: You should see the treatment I get when I’m with that car! People are friendly; they-they wanna talk, and not just about the car! One guy gave me advice about my equity investments.

equity n.公平的事物 资产净值/Equity investment generally refers to the buying and holding of shares of stock on a stock market by individuals and funds in anticipation of income from dividends and capital gain(n.资本收益) as the value of the stock(n.存货值) rises. It also sometimes refers to the acquisition of equity (ownership) participation in a private (unlisted[adj.未上市的]) company or a startup (a company being created or newly created). When the investment is in infant companies, it is referred to as venture capital(n.风险资本) investing and is generally understood to be higher risk than investment in listed going-concern situations. n.产权投资 直接投资

Chandler: What equity investments?

Joey: The ones that got me the Porsche! Will you keep up! (Chandler wipes his forehead with a baby wipe, that might have been used. He drops it disgustedly.) But I figured, if-if people keep seeing me just standing there, they’re gonna start to think that I don’t own it. So I figured I’ll wash it. Right? Monica, you got a bucket and some soap I can borrow?

Monica: Oh yeah, I got soap and sponges and rags and Carnauba wax and polishing compound.

sponge n.海绵/rag n.抹布/Carnauba is a wax derived from the leaves of a plant native to northeastern Brazil, the carnauba palm (Copernicia prunifera). It is known as “queen of waxes” and usually comes in the form of hard yellow-brown(adj.黄褐色) flakes(n.薄片). It is obtained from the leaves of the carnauba palm by collecting them, beating them to loosen the wax, then refining(v.提炼) and bleaching(v.漂白) the wax.[ n.<植>巴西棕榈(所产硬腊可用于制造上光腊,唇彩,唱片等)]

polishing compound n.抛(擦)光剂

Chandler: You don’t even have a car!

Monica: I know. But umm, one time there was this really dirty car in front of the building, so I washed it.

Chandler: And?

Monica: And six others.

Chandler: There you are这就对了.

[Scene: The Porsche, Joey is finishing up washing the car and is talking to a guy about the car.]

Joey: Yeah, she tops out at 130.

Guy #2: Wow!

Joey: And that’s just in the city. I get her up to 160 when I take her upstate.

upstate adv.在州的北部/Upstate New York is the region of New York State north of the core of the New York metropolitan area. It has a population of 7,121,911 out of New York State’s total 18,976,457.There is no clear or official boundary between Upstate New York and “Downstate New York”, with the term “Upstate” sometimes used to refer to the whole of the state besides New York City, Long Island and Westchester County, and by others to refer only to the very northernmost portion of the state (i.e. the Adirondacks and other areas north of Albany[n.奥尔巴尼(美国纽约州的首府)]), which is known as “Northern New York” or “The North Country” by the rest of New York. Often people think of Upstate New York as any areas north of Interstate 90.

Guy #2: Really! You got a place upstate?

Joey: Sure!

Guy #2: Well, I’ll see you later.

Joey: Okay, take it easy.

The Porsche Owner: Hey! That’s my car.

Joey: Really? Oh uh, oh just give me five more minutes with it.

The Porsche Owner: What-what are you doing?

Joey: Oh I-I uh, found the keys and now I’m just polishing her up.

The Porsche Owner: But it’s my car!

Joey: Yeah, but it’s my wax.

The Porsche Owner: Listen, I-I-I don’t come to this city much and I don’t know if you’re crazy or this is some kind of street theater, but could I have my keys?

street theater

Joey: Sure. Here. (He hands them over.) I’ll uh, save your parking spot帮你保留停车位.

The Porsche Owner: I’m not coming back.

Joey: Why not?

The Porsche Owner: I live upstate.

Joey: Yeah, so did I.

(The guy gets in and drives off.)

[Scene: Monica and Rachel’s, the triplets are all in their crib as Monica and Phoebe watch them.]

crib n.婴儿床

Phoebe: I don’t know why I was so nervous about this. And I don’t know why Frank and Alice are always complaining. This is so easy.

Monica: Yeah, two hours, a lifetime that’s the same.

Chandler: (entering) Check it out! Check it out! When the babies wake up, they can meet Krog! (He holds up this Xena-like warrior action figure.)

Monica: Chandler, what are you doing? That thing can put someone’s eye out!

Chandler: He can do more than that! He can destroy the universe!

Phoebe: No Chandler, they can swallow one of those little parts! And also, look at his smooth area, that’s just gonna mess them up

Monica: It’s just not an appropriate toy for 1 -year-olds. Or 30-year-olds..

Chandler: They’re not gonna swallow anything, you guys are being way too over-protective. When I was a kid, my mom used to just throw me into a pile of broken glass!

Phoebe: What?!

Chandler: Glass, sand, whatever. (Walks out as Monica and Phoebe turn to check on the babies again.)

Phoebe: Oh, look at little Leslie stretching in her sleep.

stretch vi.舒展肢体 伸懒腰

Monica: Oh it’s so cute. I wonder what age it is when you stop being able to put both legs behind your head.

Phoebe: Oh, I can still do that.

Monica: How are you still single?!

Chandler: (entering) All right. (Clears throat) I thought about it and maybe you’re right. Maybe Krog is not a safe toy.

Monica: Good. What made you change your mind?

Chandler: I swallowed the sonic blaster gun.

sonic blaster gun n.音速爆破枪

Phoebe: How did that happen?!!

Chandler: Well, I was trying to prove that I was right. Y’know? And it turns out I was wrong. And now it’s lodged in my throat. (Mimics a cat trying to cough up a hairball.) (He does it again.)

lodge vt.卡在[eg:I had somehow got the bone lodged in my throat]/cough up v.咳出/hariball n.(猫等动物因舐自身的毛而在胃或肠内逐渐积成的)毛团

Monica: Damnit! Y’know this whole time we were concentrating on watching the babies and, and no one was watching Chandler! (He does it again.)

[Scene: A judge’s chambers, Rachel and Ross are filing their annulment papers.]

chamber <美>法官办公室/file vt.提出(申请等) 提起(诉讼等)[eg:She filed a suit against the college for sex discrimination]

Judge: Okay you two are asking the court for an annulment?

Rachel: Yes your honor, and here are, are forms, all filled out.

fill out the forms v.填写表格

Judge: So based on your petition you are seeking an annulment on the grounds that Mr. Geller is mentally unstable.

petition n.诉状

Ross: Fine, I’m mentally unstable.

Judge: And based on the fact that Mr. Geller is intravenous drug user.

venous adj.静脉的/intravenous adj.静脉内的

Ross: What?!

Rachel: Uh yes, heroin and crack.

crack n.纯可卡因

Ross: Crack isn’t even an intravenous drug!

Rachel: Well, you would know.

Judge: Now it also says here that you lied about your sexual preference before marriage?

sexual preference n.性选取 性偏好

Ross: Oh, come on!

Rachel: (starts to cry) Ross, please, I found the magazines!

Judge: And finally that you were unable to consummate the marriage. Well, that makes sense since you’re gay and addicted to heroin.

consummate vt.圆房 完婚 做房事

Ross: Okay, I’m sorry, this is insane! I-I-I’m not addicted to heroin, I’m not gay, and there is no problem with my ability to consummate anything! Look, I’ll consummate this marriage right here, right now!

Judge: That won’t be necessary.

Ross: And when we were dating we consummated like bunnies!

Rachel: Ugh!

Judge: Now if you two were involved in a serious relationship, that really creates a problem.

Rachel: Ross! Your honor, rest assured that relationship ended like two years ago! (To the stenographer) And could you strike “Consummated like bunnies” from the record?

rest assured adv.确信无疑 放心放心[eg:You can rest assured that your son will be happy here] /steno n.速记/stenographer n.速记员/strike vt.删掉 取消[eg:She read through her essay and struck out a few words here and there]

Judge: Is there, anything in this record that is actually true?

Rachel: Well, yes, we got married in Vegas and uh, and the names I think.

Judge: That’s not the way the legal system works. This process is based on an objective review of the facts, not of the lies.

Rachel: Objection!

Judge: It doesn’t work like that either.

Rachel: Overruled.

overrule vt.否决 驳回

Ross: Oh, stop it.

Judge: Well, based on what I heard, you two certainly don’t qualify for an annulment. If you two don’t want to be together you’ll have to file for divorce.

qualify for v.使合格 有…的资格/file for v.申请

Ross: (stands up) That’s great! Are you happy now? Look what you did with your funny, funny form!

Rachel: (stands up as well) What?! Me?! What about you and your consummated like bunnies nonsense!

Ross: And what—(notices the stenographer is still typing)—What are you typing that for? Did you hear what she said? We don’t get the annulment. Don’t type that! What?! Stop typing! (He goes over to where the stenographer is typing and in the process pushes Rachel out of his way.) Hey! Stop typing! (He’s still typing.) Stop typing! Stop typing!!

Rachel: (to the judge) Okay, do you see, do you see what you’re keeping me married to?!

Judge: You need to get out of my chambers.

Rachel: All right look lady here is the deal, I came here for an annulment and I am not leaving here until I get one!

Ross: Yeah!

Judge: Would you like to spend the night in jail?

Rachel: And thank you for your time. (They both beat a hasty retreat.)

beat a retreat v.撤退 放弃

Commercial Break

[Scene: Monica and Rachel’s, Chandler is still doing the hairball thing as Monica and Phoebe are watching the babies. I can’t describe it, you’ll have to see it when it comes on in your area.]

Joey: (entering wearing nothing but Porsche clothes) So the Porsche guy took his car back.

Chandler: But you found the keys to his clothes?

Joey: No. No, I just uh, I just loved the way it feels when everybody thinks I own a Porsche.

Monica: And people will think you own a Porsche because you’re wearing the clothes?

Joey: Of course! Only an idiot would wear this stuff if you didn’t have the car! Right?

Chandler: That is true.

Phoebe: Yeah, but only a genius would swallow a sonic blaster gun.

Joey: Oh, I’ve been there我也这样过. Yeah, I am gonna go drive my Porsche. (Starts to leave.)

Monica: Joey, you know you don’t actually have one.

Joey: Come on! What are you doing?! I’m in character! Would you talk to her! (Storms out.)

be in character v.入戏 演戏

Chandler: Ahh, I think it just moved. It’s really poking me.

Monica: All right, that’s it, we’re going to the emergency room.

Phoebe: What?! No, you can’t, you can’t leave me here with them! We’re baby-sitting!

Monica: The babies are asleep, I’m sure you’ll be okay on your own for a while!

Phoebe: But you-you can’t leave me with them! We-we’re a team! We’re playing a zone! They’re gonna triple team me!

Monica: He’s got something plastic lodged in his throat, we’ve got to go to the hospital.

Phoebe: But no, because a doctor won’t be able to help him, it’s just gonna y’know naturally pass through his system in like seven years.

Chandler: I think that’s gum.

Phoebe: I’m pretty sure it’s gun.

Chandler: Okay, listen this really hurts. Let’s go.

Phoebe: No, ’cause A real man wouldn’t just run to the hospital! (They don’t stop.) No! What would, what would Krog do? (They ignore her and Phoebe is left alone.)

[Scene: The street, Joey is hanging out wearing his Porsche grab.]

grab n.吸引物 影响

Joey: Why isn’t that valet back with my Porsche?

valet n.伺候客人停车 用车的人

Passerby: Maybe because you’ve got the keys?

Joey: (to women passing him) Porsche.

(Ross and Rachel approach, they’re still yelling at each other.)

Rachel: This is totally your fault!

Ross: My fault?! You threatened the judge!

Rachel: Well, you ripped the paper out of the court reporter’s machine!!

Ross: That was the only way I could get him to stop typing!

Joey: Hi! How are the Gellers?

Rachel: Don’t call us that! (Storms away)

Ross: The judge wouldn’t let us get an annulment! Now we gotta get a divorce!! Did a Porsch throw up on you? (Walks on.)

throw up on sb对…呕吐

Joey: Hey! It’s Porsche!! (He’s right y’know.)

[Scene: Monica and Rachel’s, Phoebe is being triple teamed.]

Phoebe: Me taking care of you is no problem, huh? You guys feel safe. Right? Okay, I’m gonna take that spit bubble as, “Yeah, I do!” Okay, after I get rid of this dirty diaper Leslie, I’ll set you up with a clean one. (She throws it at the garbage without looking, misses, and knocks over a vase and flowers, which fall to the floor and break.) Okay, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. I just have to clean that up. Okay? ‘Cause let’s face it, we’re at Monica’s. (She crawls over, disposes of the diaper, picks up the flowers, and the vase.) I broke it. All right. Well, that’s just the way things go. (She throws out both the flowers and the vase.) Okay, good. (She turns around and only counts two babies.) Why are there only two of you? Where is Leslie? Well, you can’t answer. (She starts looking for her) Leslie? Where are you Leslie? Leslie, now would be a good time for your first words! (She turns around and finds that Leslie has managed to crawl into the bottom drawer of the TV cabinet.) Well, look at you! Hey! You are a little bit mischievous! My gosh! (She picks her up and notices a surprise is waiting in the drawer.) Oh, you’re a lot mischievous! My gosh,Well, it’ll dry. (Closes the drawer with her foot.) (To Leslie) Okay, you sit with your brother and sister now—who aren’t there! (They both have disappeared as well.)

set sb up with v.向…提供/knock over v.打翻/mischievous adj.恶作剧的 调皮的 淘气的

[Time Lapse, the babies are finally asleep. Good for Phoebe! The only problem is, Monica’s apartment looks like a tornado, a hurricane, a swarm of locusts, fire, brimstone, hail, and giant man-eating, radioactive ants have torn the place apart. Needless to say, it’s messy enough to cause Monica to die of shock right away. Parents with small children know what I’m talking about.]

a swarm of adj.一群 一堆/locust n. <动>蝗虫/brimstone n.硫磺/hail n.冰雹/radioactive adj.放射性的

Chandler: (entering) Hey!

Phoebe: (exhausted) How do you feel?

Chandler: Well, let’s just say that Krog will be fully equipped to destroy the universe again in twelve to fourteen hours.

Phoebe: Okay, so I totally took care of the babies all by myself! I fed‘em, bathed ‘em, and put‘em to bed.

Chandler: And protected them from a tornado?

(Monica enters and her jaw drops in horror.)

jaw n.下巴

Monica: Oh my God.

Phoebe: I know, the babies are asleep.

Monica: Phoebe, what, what happened here?!

Phoebe: I did it! I took care of the babies all by myself!

Monica: But my apartment!

Chandler: Was the setting of Phoebe’s triumph.

setting n.(舞台等的)布景/triumph n.胜利

Monica: But the mess!

Chandler: Is not as important as the fact that Phoebe took care of the babies all by herself.

Monica: You’re right, you’re right I shouldn’t freak out.‘Cause this is what will happen when you and I have babies! When will that be?!

Chandler: (pause) Phoebe, would you take a look at this mess!!!!

[Scene: Ross’s apartment, Rachel is packing what she still has over there as Ross enters.]

Rachel: (deadpan) Oh honey thank God you’re home, I was getting worried.

Ross: I picked up the divorce papers. Uh, I’ve already signed everything and I put little‘X’s where you need to sign.

Rachel: Oh, little ‘X’s! Great! That makes up for everything!

make up for v.补偿

Ross: Y’know, I-I—you’ve done a lot of stupid stuff too! Okay?

Rachel: Oh, name one stupid thing that is as stupid as this one!

Ross: Okay, how about you flew to London to stop my wedding! Ah, how about you told me you loved me after I was already married!

Rachel: Hey! Wait a minute! That was different! I did those things because I was in love with you!

Ross: Yeah! Right!

(Pause.)

Ross: You’re right. That’s very different. So let’s, let’s just sign the papers. All right? (Sits down and Rachel keeps standing there.) What?

Rachel: Nothing. (Sits down.)

Ross: Okay, can we just sign please?

Rachel: Uh-hmm. (Just as Rachel finishes signing her name, Ross yanks each page out of the way.)

yank vi.猛地一拉 使劲一拉

Ross: Congratulations. (Gets up to leave.)

Rachel: Okay Ross, we’re—wait a minute. Umm, I uh, I kinda have a little confession.

confession n.坦白 供认 <宗>忏悔 告解

Ross: What?

Rachel: Well, y’know this whole marriage thing, kinda my idea.

Ross: Excuse me?

Rachel: Well, remember how we were too drunk to remember anything the night we were married?

Ross: Yeah?

Rachel: And uh, yeah, I didn’t really, I didn’t want to say anything, but it kinda it just, it kinda kept coming back to me, and umm, remember we were in the casino and for some reason you thought it would be funny to eat a lot of grapes. And uh, and I thought it would be funnier if we got married. So as a, as a compromise we decided first to get married, and then (Ross joins in) to eat a lot of grapes. So umm, sorry I got us into this whole thing.

compromise n.折衷 妥协

Ross: So then if-if—I mean if you think about it, this is all (Pause.) your fault.

Rachel: Yeah, don’t push it though但不要得寸进尺.

Ross: I’ve got to say; I know I divorce a lot of women, never thought I would be divorcing you.

Rachel: I know. I always thought if you and I got married, it would be the one that stuck. And it wouldn’t be a secret, and we wouldn’t have our wedding dinner at Pizza Hut. (They both laugh.)

stick  vi.坚持 固守

Ross: Did I, did I even treat?

treat v.款待 请(客)

Rachel: No, it was on the house, it was, it was a newlywed special.

on the house<美俚>主人开销的 免费的[eg: This barbecued chicken is on the house]/ 按 on the house直 译 是 「在 房 子 上 」, 为 甚 么 却 解 作 「免 费 招 待 」呢 ?原 来 house这 里 是 指 public house(酒 馆 )。 从前美国酒馆有一个惯例︰顾 客 每 喝 三 杯 , 酒 馆 就 奉 送 一 杯 , 这 一 杯 自 然 是 on the house(算 在 酒 馆 账 上 )了 。 这 是 诱 使 顾 客 多 喝 酒 多 消 费 的 招 数 。 一 九 一 九 至 三 三 年 间 , 美 国 实 行 禁 酒 (prohibition), 这 「三 送 一 」惯 例 也 就 式 微 了 , 不 过 , on the house一 词 则 流 传 了 下 来 ︰ 人 们 用 这 成 语 来 说 「由 店 方 赠 送 」、 「免 费 」、 「费 用 由 公 司 或 团 体 支 付 」等 , 例 如 ︰ Dessert was served at the end of the meal. The waiter said it was on the house. (餐 后 侍 应 端 来 甜 点 , 说 是 免 费 奉 送 的  /newlywed n.新婚夫妇/special <美口>(临时减价的)特价商品

Ross: That may be the most depressing thing I’ve heard in my life. I should probably get these to my lawyer’s office.

depressing adj.抑郁的 胸闷的

Rachel: Hey, thanks Ross, for taking care of all of this.

Ross: Eh, no problem.

(They hug.)

Rachel: I’m gonna need a copy of those.

Ross: Totally. (Exits.)

Ending Credits

[Scene: The street, Joey is messing with a car cover and still wearing the Porsche stuff. This guy playing street football catches a pass next to the car cover Joey is fooling around with.]

mess with v.胡乱摆弄

Joey: Hey! Hey! Be careful around my Porsche!

Woman: (the same one from before approaches) Hi Joey.

Joey: Hey! How you doin’?

Woman: (to her friend) He has the most amazing Porsche under there!

Joey: I’d love to show ya, but I just tucked her in. She’s sleeping. (The women both laugh) Hey uh, would you two girls like to go for a drink? (Just then the same guy with the football dives to make a catch, lands on the car cover, and collapses it. It turns out that Joey set up a bunch of boxes to make it look like a Porsche.)

tuck vt.把…舒服地裹好(+in)

End

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